Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Greek is my savior

I know it's lame, but this show gives me so much insight into... well, a lot of things. Most of all, of course, is relationships. Yesterday's episode is especially freaky. It brought up a lot of good questions and a lot of good points about how relationships work out, for short term or the long haul.

Casey is ready to graduate and go on to law school, grow up and move on with her life beyond college. Cappie is not, he just wants to stay in college until he's ready to leave the party life.

This is how they were brought up: Casey's are "regular" people, who mentally grow up and work and live according to social standards. Cappie's are unconventional hippies, they didn't marry, they traveled a lot, and believe education is lifelong so he should stay as long as he wants, because he has the money to anyway.

The two love each other, though, so how can they work it out? Casey keeps thinking of the future, and how it doesn't seem possible if they are on such different tracks. Cappie doesn't want to worry about that, and just live in the moment, and worry about graduation when it comes. "We'll worry about it then," he keeps saying.

And then someone said something that really hit me. Some loves aren't meant to last forever. Some loves are short love stories, but love stories nonetheless. In the end, Casey accepts that she and Cappie love each other and work well together, but only in college. Their love story is a short one. Once college is over, so are they. 

Where does that leave me? 

It makes me wonder, did I end things too hastily, worrying about the future when the present isn't even certain? This uncertainty is what kills me. Our relationship was the kind that was serious, the kind you'd consider for the rest of your life. I didn't know if I was ready for that, especially at 20 and with both of our futures so unsure. I didn't want to do him wrong but in the end, did I anyway? Should I have let our relationship go on, as long as we're happy, until we're no longer? And not worry so much about the future? Should I have let it be a short love story, if it was one, hoping it could develop into a long love story? I feel like I threw out something good before its expiration date, when I don't even know what that date is, or if it exists. What have I done...